Attack!

"Your promises, they look like lies
Your honesty, like a back that hides a knife (knife)
I promise you (promise you)
I promise you (promise you)
And I am finally free

Run away, run away, I'll attack
Run away, run away, go chase yourself
Run away, run away, now I'll attack
I'll attack, I'll attack, I will attack"

Those lyrics above are from a song called 'Attack' by 30 Seconds To Mars. I wanted to start this with those lyrics because recently, well the past week, I have felt like I am being attacked by the devil. I can really feel a fight going on in my heart.

Inside this fight is tearing me up inside... I am trying to hold on but its hard. It feels like everything is crashing down all at once.

Life at home is crap, everyone is in a mood all the time and always arguing. I'm constantly worried about my dads health, about how my nan is and how Auntie Maggie and Uncle Tim are doing.

Exams at college and all the stress of all my friends falling out and having breakdowns themselves. I am carrying the group on my shoulders - trying to keep us all together... where are they when I need them?

Satan is really attacking me atm. With my relationships, family and friends. I know I should be turning to God but I dont know what to say. I feel like I have done something wrong and that God is going to be disappointed in me. It propably sounds stupid but I am scared of what my dad in Heaven is going to say to me for not turning to Him earlier.

All I know right now is that I am being attacked but the Devil, he is using me as his weapon! My heart is the fight... one that I feel I am loosing.